The results of a five-year study on suicide trends were published in Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology a few years ago, indicating people are more likely to commit suicide on Wednesdays than any other day of the week. As a public service, we offer a number of common-sensible things can be instituted to get life and limb over Hump Day:
- Use different calendars. The Gregorian Calendar helps us synch with our clients. But preceded by the Sunday Night Dreads, the workweek begins on Monday. Wednesday follows Tuesday and precedes Thursday. The routine becomes existentially numbing. At OCG, we each use a different calendar. We use the same clocks to maintain some semblance of a daily schedule. But some of us celebrate Ground Hog Day the same day others celebrate Our Lady of Guadalupe Day. We have no predictable routines, no Wednesdays, and an endless variety of things to discuss around the water cooler.
- Swap jobs. This is a never-ending source of mirth and frivolity. Our most successful instance was the day Steve Mildew from IT Operations swapped jobs with Mildred Blitz in Payroll. Somewhere around 10:30 that morning, our computer network crashed; and everyone received a $5,000 bonus. What a blast.
- Wear boxing gloves. Manual dexterity is like electricity, cell service, and underwear: you never know how much you rely on it till you have to do without. Since everyone shares the disadvantage, this can be an endless test of resourcefulness, a wonderful team-building exercise, and a welcome source of amusement. There is, however, some distress: users of computers, smart phones, and PDAs suffer most, followed by chronic nose-pickers.
As a last resort — since we share just one human condition and since no problem is unique — maybe we can try talking to each other a bit more. Even if it’s just on Wednesdays, maybe we can try caring about each other a bit more, looking out for each other a bit more, making each other feel a bit less alone in our suffering.
It couldn’t hurt.
Jack Dempsey ring loc 50497v.jpg, licensed under Public domain via Wikimedia Commons.