The Father of Invention

The Father of Invention

by | Oct 15, 2014

Necessity is the mother of invention. (variously attributed) Historians are inching closer to consensus on the notion that if necessity is the mother invention, recreation must be the father of invention. While all of history has manifested evidence of males’...
Don’t Blink

Don’t Blink

by | Oct 10, 2014

Sammy’s big on eye contact. When he speaks to you, he likes to look you square in the peepers. And if he thinks your attention is wandering in any way, he’ll get in your face. If push comes to shove, he’ll flop on his side or roll over on his back or...
Would You Like Fries With That Wake?

Would You Like Fries With That Wake?

by | Oct 9, 2014

With all of the emails I receive about funeral insurance quotes, I shouldn’t have been surprised by this. But I was. Call me naïve. After all, if we’re too lazy to get out of our cars for coffee or fast food or banking — things we want, presumably, and...
Assume the Position

Assume the Position

by | Oct 3, 2014

Matilda ardently believes it’s critically important to assume the proper position for every task. Here, she deftly demonstrates her technique for straddling the back of a chair. While she’s typically reluctant to reveal her trade secrets, she does find...
Quote Me on That

Quote Me on That

by | Oct 2, 2014

Prevailing wisdom contends that the most important aspect of direct-email marketing is the subject line. I hadn’t given the notion all that much thought until I started receiving a blizzard of such emails, all with this attention-grabbing subject line: Burial...